Stop All The Clocks
by annakendrickfortyseven
Summary: Beca and Aubrey discuss what to say at Chloe's funeral. Short sad drabbly piece I just sort of had to get out. Bechloe, could be perceived as Triple Treble if that floats your boat.


"I dunno, it just doesn't feel right yet."

Beca said, slumped at her desk, having been there for almost two hours.

"Maybe a song isn't the right way to go then Beca," Aubrey replied softly from the couch. "You don't have to do a song you know, just because you write them. You could write a speech like me, or recite a poem. It doesn't even have to be your own. Google it." Aubrey continued, coming over and placing her hands on Beca's shoulders, rubbing softly and reading what she had written over her shoulder.

"I guess so. I just know that she loved my singing. I thought she would like it."

"She loved you. No matter what you do, she would love it to pieces Becs." Aubrey said as she walked back and slumped on the couch.

"Don't. I'm sorry, thank you for saying that but just please don't... don't call me that. Chloe called me that."

"I'm sorry." Aubrey backtracked, realising her mistake.

"No, don't apologise. It's stupid. I'm sorry I snapped." Beca pushed her chair back from the desk and sat next to Aubrey on the sofa, and was pulled in for a sympathetic hug.

"Don't be sorry. I should have thought."

"It's just..." Beca trailed off, her head resting on Aubrey's shoulder.

"What?"

"I miss her Aubrey. So fucking much. It's like everything I do reminds me of her. When you called me Becs, it shouldn't have mattered because everyone called me that. But so did Chloe, and it just made me think of her. Our whole lives have been fucking turned upside down, but the world is still turning like nothing happened. It's so selfish, but i feel like the whole world should be mourning. Like they need to appreciate what we've lost. She was everything to me Aubrey. She was my world and now she's fucking gone." Beca choked on the last sentence, tears welling and threatening to fall down her sombre face. "I want her back." she whispered, her voice cracking.

Aubrey felt that familiar lump in her throat, the one that had been intermittently present since Chloe's sudden death three weeks prior. She held Beca close and let her turn over and sob into her chest, and stroked her hair and back.

"I know. I know. She meant so much to be too, and I miss her more than I ever imagined possible." Aubrey whispered through thick tears, as they rolled down her face.

Aubrey held Beca until both their tears subsided, and gently lifted Beca's head to look at her.

"Beca, I was thinking about what you said, and I think I know what you should say at the funeral."

"Mhmm?" Beca mumbled.

"Have you seen Four Weddings and a Funeral? With Hugh Grant?" Aubrey said as she sniffed, wiping her nose on the back of her hand and wiping her tears away.

"No. Why?"

"Doesn't matter. But there's a poem in there that I think encapsulates your feelings."

Aubrey pulled out her phone and found the poem on Google, passing it to Beca to read. A minute passed, and Beca passed it back, again wiping tears from her face.

"It's perfect Aubrey, thank you. There's one line that I think I might change but that's all."

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

"Thank you, Aubrey, for those beautiful words. Now, Chloe's girlfriend Beca would like to say a few words." The priest said, motioning for Beca to come up to the front.

Beca walked up towards where Aubrey was waiting, and Aubrey squeezed her hand and whispered an "okay?" In her ear, and returned to her seat once Beca nodded in reply. Beca placed her well thumbed piece of paper on the lectern, despite knowing what she was going to say. She looked out into the sea of faces, most she knew, but some she didn't, as they looked back at her with sympathetic smiles.

"I would first like to thank everybody for coming. Seeing how many people cared about Chloe really does make me realise how much of a wonderful and popular person she was. Is. I thought a lot about what I wanted to say today, and with the help of my lovely friend Aubrey, I found this poem. I'd like to quickly acknowledge to any hardcore W H Auden fans that I did slightly change this from the original."

Beca took a deep breath, and held on to the side of the lectern with one hand, and picked at her thumb with the other. Aubrey looked at her from her space in the pews and gave her a nod of encouragement, as did many of her other friends who had turned up.

"This is Stop All The Clocks by W H Auden"

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,  
>Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,<br>Silence the pianos and with muffled drum  
>Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.<p>

Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead  
>Scribbling on the sky the message "She Is Dead",<br>Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,  
>Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.<p>

She was my North, my South, my East and West,  
>My working week and my Sunday rest,<br>My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;  
>I thought we would have forever: I was wrong.<p>

The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;  
>Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;<br>Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.  
>For nothing now can ever come to any good."<p>

Beca wiped away the tears that had fallen from throughout the poem, and continued to speak, letting the tears now flow freely, as they did not seem to want to stop.

"While this poem perfectly captures my feelings since the accident, I don't think that it is what Chloe would have wanted. Chloe wouldn't want us to grieve forever. She would want us to be happy, in the way that she almost always was. So we mustn't put out the stars, pack up the moon and dismantle the sun, but instead, when we miss her- which may seem like all the time right now, but when we do miss her, we should be happy for the time we did get to spend with her. Chloe was on this planet for far too short a time, but she's up there dancing among the stars and the moon and the sun now, so we can't put them away. We can just look at them, and remember her, for her beauty and elegance like the moon, her brightness like the stars, and the way her personality shone with the force of a thousand suns. So we can look to the sky, and always remember her. Even if it's cloudy, because let's face it, she was feisty too. But it was the mix of her perfections and her faults that made the Chloe I loved. The Chloe I love. I love you Chlo, and I will never forget you"


End file.
